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Their inner critic is constantly telling them that they are getting old, they are not pretty or that they are too fat.
The situation is even worse for working moms who additionally feel that they are coming up short in terms of their families and their careers.
Negative talk that our inner critic engages in is nothing more than what we unconsciously believe about ourselves.
If you are struggling to find meaning and success in your life, begin to listen closely to what your inner critic is saying to you.
Maybe it's telling you know that there is no way you can achieve something.
Perhaps it's telling you not to take the risk of starting your own business because you will fail? Certainly external factors play a role in how your life unfolds, but make no mistake, your mindset - particularly whether your internal dialogue is positive or negative - plays the biggest role.
Your thinking is about 90% responsible for the life that you have right now.
Negative thinking is reversible.
You can indeed reprogram your mind to erase all of the debilitating messages about yourself that you have internalized from family members, friends, romantic partners and society.
One way to change the messages that your inner voice is leveling at you is to find things you have accomplished, no matter how small, almost as a counter argument.
Begin to recognize what your inner critic is saying and why, and counteract whatever it tells you that is negative with a positive statement.
Many times whatever it is saying is simply a lie, so seek to uncover what fear, old wound or insecurity is underneath the negative statement.
Affirmations combined with actions are the best way to transform you thinking and your life.
An affirmation is a short positive empowering statement declared in the present tense.
In other words, to affirm yourself you should not say: "One day I will become.
" No, you need to claim it right NOW by saying: "I am!" Examples of affirmations are: "I am living a healthy lifestyle.
" "I am in a supportive, loving relationship.
" "I am able to meet all of my financial obligations.
" However if you are having a hard time with the "I am" statement because it makes you feel like a phony try, "I am in the process of" such as "I am in process of obtaining my ideal job" or "I'm in the process of having a slimmer body.
" Another way to re-phrase your affirmation is to say that "I've decided.
" "I've decided that I am going to buy a vacation home" or "I've decided to work three days a week.
" Affirmation alone won't change your life--you also need to take action.
Similar to the Bible scripture "Prayer without work is dead," affirmation without action is useless.
Your concept of yourself will be transformed when you see yourself making strides toward your goals and ultimately achieving them.
Even if you are only taking baby steps, commit to taking regular and consistent actions that will get to closer and closer to your goal.
The affirmations will boost your self-esteem and quell your fears as you keep stepping in the direction of your goals.
This week think about what your inner critic is saying.
How has this negative talk affected your ability to have the life that you want? Has your inner voice discouraged you from moving beyond the comfort zone of your current existence? Take a few minutes and create to an affirmation that will support one goal that you would like to achieve.
It could be a short or long term accomplishment.
Everyday when you rise and before you go to bed, say your affirmation.
Each day also think about at least one thing that you can do toward achieving your goal.
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