Defining Success: Creating Goals that are Right for You

"What do you want more of in your life?" My guess is that if I were to ask each of you to list your top three answers, money would feature for most, if not all of you.
If I had more money, I could have the house of my dreams.
I could have a bigger car.
Quit my job.
Travel the world.
Sounds pretty good doesn't it? If that's the case though, why do so many millionaires continue to work even when they don't need to? Why do so many lottery winners lose the money and say they wish they'd never won? Maybe we need to redefine a few key terms, like wealth, success, prosperity, abundance.
One of the mistakes we often make in setting our goals is using terms that are not right for us.
I'm sure my attorney friends would consider success a partnership in their firm, a company Mercedes and a home in one of the local subdivisions where a million dollars buys 5 bedrooms and no land.
Meanwhile, I want to own a hybrid and a cottage with plenty of room for a large herb garden.
Another friend would love to have enough money to quit his job and live on the beach.
I'd be bored without the constant challenges that I set for myself.
You see, everyone's dream is different, and so everyone's definition of success is different.
My definition does not require millions of dollars.
It does require frequent change, open air, and personal growth.
If I were to follow someone else's definitions, I may achieve it, but it would be empty, providing no satisfaction.
So how do you set your own goals? How can you discover what success means for you? It doesn't have to be as difficult as you might think, but it may take time, and some soul-searching.
Start by asking yourself some questions.
1.
If you could do anything in the world, what would it be? 2.
What is one thing you would love to do before you die? 3.
What one change would make the biggest difference to your life and how? If it really is having $10,000,000, be specific about how that money would buy you a better life.
Is it the money itself that would improve your lie, or the things it could buy? 4.
What do you want less of in your life? Sometimes, working backwards can help define goals more clearly.
5.
If your relationship/ career/ life were ideal, how would it differ from what you have now? Use these questions to start highlighting a few key areas.
This is where a life coach can help you if you get stuck.
Ultimately success is about happiness.
All of us want to be happy, but because so many of us pursue goals or dreams that are determined by someone else, we feel dissatisfied or always reaching.
Creating your own definition of success can help each of you create your own path to happiness.
Once the goal is setting, aiming becomes that much easier.
© Fiona Young-Brown, August 2006