How To Catch a Mouse Without Killing It

In an ideal world, our homes would be pristine bastions of hygiene, devoid of dust, pollen, mosquitoes, cockroaches and odors.
Every surface would gleam, the air would be redolent of vanilla or the clean, fresh scent of flowers.
Nothing would scuttle or scurry under the sink, inside the walls, beneath the bed, over our faces as we sleep at night.
But for the majority of us, life just gets in the way of making that happen, which often leaves us with unwanted visitors in our home.
Catching them usually involves a slipper and a smear on the wall, but what if you have an actual rodent in your home? Do you want to kill it? Blood and guts everywhere, gleaming and hot and steamy on trembling fur, little paws curling, tail twitching, brilliant black eyes losing their luster as the specter of death casts a pall over them? The answer is no, and so here's a method to help you catch a mouse if one is intrepid enough to attempt to plunder your home of salubrious goodies.
First you need a pair of pencils or straight sticks.
Second, get yourself a wide section of packing tape.
Place both pencils parallel to each other on the tape, about an inch apart, with the tape cross-wise about 2/3rds of the way up.
From there ladle a small amount of peanut butter or press a chip into the tape between the two pencils.
Make sure its fixed well, and then place a second piece of tape across the food, holding it in place while still leaving a chunk of it uncovered.
Now comes the tricky part.
Find a place along a wall.
Mice, you see, love to scurry along the edges of rooms, eschewing the vast open spaces that terrify them so.
Your point picked, lay down a broad section of cardboard.
This is essential.
Do not skip this part.
Cardboard down, place the two sticks with succulent morsel attached upright within a heavy bowl, so that the sticks prop the bowl up.
When the mouse reaches for the goodie, it will push the pencils over, removing the integral pencils, so that the bowl falls down and traps it.
Voila! Now the piece de resistance.
When you wake up in the morning and find your bowl trapped over the intrusive critter, simple scoop up the whole ensemble by lifting the cardboard sheet, and exit your home in a calm and unhurried manner.
Saunter a good 100 feet away and release the wee sleekit beastie.
That distance is optimal because it ensures the mouse will not return but also doesn't stress you out overmuch by making you walk too far from your home.