Should You Leave Him (or Her)? Knowing When to Breakup an Unhealthy Relationship

Sometimes, it can be difficult to know when to leave a relationship. Perhaps things aren't great, but they're not too bad either. It's easy to sit on the fence for a while and just let fate take over, but it's better to make a deliberate choice to stay or go. When making this decision, an important question to ask yourself is, "Is this relationship unhealthy?"

Unhealthy relationships follow identifiable patterns. Though circumstances always vary from couple to couple, they are often characterized by:

- Frequent arguments
- Frequent criticism on either side
- Inability to tolerate the other's personal quirks
- Intolerance of the other's friends or family
- Unfair expectations
- Hyper-sensitivity by one or both partners
- Intolerance of occasional lapses of attention
- Psychological problems that lead to behavioral ones
- Inability to address conflicts in a mature fashion
- Excessive jealousy and mistrust
- Extreme insecurity or major obstacles involving low self-esteem
- One or both partners have addictive or destructive tendencies
- Few, if any, mutual friends
- One partner gets easily upset over unimportant or petty things
- Excessive clingy-ness
- One or both partners feels as if they are "walking on eggshells" much of the time
- Difficulty discussing feelings

This is by no means and exhaustive list, and just represents some of the traits that characterize an unhealthy relationship.

Your significant other is supposed to be a source of comfort in the world, not a persistent source of stress and anxiety. If your relationship offers no sense of peace or safety, it's time to end it. If the problems escalate to physical or emotional abuse, the need to breakup is even more urgent.

If you want to leave your partner but have too much fear and anxiety at the thought of breaking up, there is help. Ladies can find breakup guidance here, and men can find help here.