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You are saying to yourself, "I'm still in love with my ex!" But at the same time, you feel in your bones that it is really over for good.
What to do? Well, to start with, you should be more positive.
Many relationships that look like they are in the toilet, can in fact be saved.
The two people involved, find a way to get back together.
Now before going any further, you need to ask yourself a couple of questions.
Should this relationship actually be saved? If there was physical or emotional abuse, then perhaps not.
Maybe the relationship is better off dead, so you can put yourself back together again and move on.
The reason for this is that if you get back with a violent ex, there is a strong risk that former bad behavior will repeat itself.
On the other hand, if the relationship simply petered out, if there was a misunderstanding, loss of trust or even an argument, then all is not lost.
You can repair the relationship, if you have an action plan and know what to do.
More on that in a bit.
The good thing about declaring "I'm still in love with my ex" is that you had, and still have, strong feelings for him/her.
Most likely your former mate feels the same way about you.
You could build on that.
The second question you must ask yourself, then, is Does my ex still love me? Does he still at least have some feelings for me at all? You will need to get some sense as to the answer to that question before going too much farther.
Let some time pass, say at least a week or two.
Then call your ex, and ask if you can meet, just to talk.
Do not beg or plead.
Be casual and polite.
Now think of what you will say when you meet him or her.
How will you convince her to take you back? Why should she? What will your life be like? Will it be different and better than before? Meet in a neutral, public place, where neither of you will be tempted to cause a scene.
This first meeting is liable to be difficult for both of you.
Keep a firm handle on your emotions.
But do not be afraid to show some passion.
Talk about your future life together, your dreams and hopes, and where he fits into this picture.
The two of you can make a great life together, if you can just get over this admittedly serious hurdle.
However, your ex is not your total dream and hope for the future.
Let him know that he is a big part of it, that you can build a real relationship together, this time.
But you are not needy or fixated on him.
You each have your own lives to live.
You just want him to know that there is a big place for him in yours.
Listen at least as much as you talk.
Pay close attention to what your ex says, and to her body language.
No matter how much in love two people are, they still need some space of their own.
If you do all this, then your thought that "I'm still in love with my ex" should find a similar echo in your former lover.
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