Preparing Your Child to Accept Divorce Without Bitterness

The innocent victims of divorce are the children.
Helpless to change their own fate, they watch in horror as their parents fight and separate.
There's no easy way to break the news to a child that you and your spouse are calling it quits, but if you go about it in the right way, you may be able to save them some pain and guilt.
Your child, especially if very young, has a preconceived idea of what the perfect family is like, and when this pattern is disrupted, the child doesn't know how to deal with it.
You may see his or her insecurity surface as misbehavior or depression.
Your knowing how to handle the situation in the best way possible will be critical to your child's future.
When someone feels as insecure as your child will in this situation, it's important to reassure them that both parents still love them.
The break-up isn't something they caused, and it didn't happen because either parent didn't care about the child any longer.
Explain that Mommy and Daddy just can't get along with each other any longer in the same way that the child doesn't always get along well with every other child at school.
It may be difficult for the child to understand how you could have loved each other once but don't any longer, but at least he'll be able to feel that his position in life is secure.
Both parents should work at strengthening their own bonds with their child.
You should never try and get at your ex-spouse using your child.
Instead, make an effort to promote the relationship with the child and both parents.
Do activities together.
You don't have to spend a lot of money, if that is an issue, because you can do things together like going to the park.
Your child will be perfectly happy with that, especially if you're doing it with him or her.
Make time to talk to your child about things that are important to him, and be sure to listen.
Don't allow your own sad feelings to interefere with your relationship with your little one.
You don't want your child to develop a bitter attitude towards the world just because of this experience.
Keeping your own bitterness at bay will go a long way towards keeping your child happy and emotionally-healthy.
Admittedly, this may be difficult for you as you struggle with your own feelings and insecurities, but it's in the best interest of your child to keep it as genuinely positive as possible.