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Some more knowledgeable ones accept the fact that it is infatuation.
When teenagers especially males start feeling attracted towards a particular opposite sex they tend to be cold towards the latter all in the bid to get rid of the feeling.
Although this is not so for some others, they immediately act in the direction of their attraction which may bring about dangerous consequences if not managed well.
Here is the story of a fourteen year old girl.
She met john in junior secondary school and immediately liked him but she kept it to herself.
John also had similar feelings for her so he decided to keep her at a distance because he did not want to have anything to do with her.
She often wondered why John hated her so much.
She summoned up courage, approached him and asked him why? After some time John opened up to her that he was ''in love with her'' with her like he thought.
They both started to date.
She sneaked out of her house to meet John at planned places.
she even lied about extramural classes just to be with John.
John also felt that he was in love because of those things he had heard about butterflies in the stomach, heart skips and so on.
She and John tasted the unripe fruit and she became pregnant by then they were in the senior secondary school.
they were caught trying to abort the pregnancy.
she had to stop schooling at age sixteen.
John was allowed to finish his secondary education before he was forced to marry her after two sorrowful years they went their separate ways abandoning the child with John's mother.
They both fell prey to what is referred to as teenage fantasy.
Teenage fantasy is an exciting or unusual feeling teenagers get when they imagine certain acts of love, strong emotional desires happening to them.
FACTORS CAUSING TEENAGE FANTASY 1.
TEENAGERS WHO FEED THEIR EYES ON PORNOGRAPHIC PICTURES I was in a taxi one day, sitting next to me was a teenager not more than seventeen years old.
He was holding a magazine.
I was bored so I asked him to let me have a look and opening the cover page staring at me was a female breast and buttocks bare flipped through the pages half heartedly and you can't imagine the images I saw.
I handed it back to him still baffled then he told me that the magazine was very scarce and expensive was shocked.
When you begin to imagine the amount of money teenagers spend on pornographic picture and films these days you begin to wonder where exactly did things go wrong? 2.
EARLY EXPOSURE TO SEXUAL ACTS ON THE PART OF THE TEENAGER 3.
Some teenagers have been exposed to sexual acts at a very tender age.
The blue films they watch, some even witness life experiences.
I remember a couple who lived in one room with their children at night when having sex their children wake up watching them.
Such acts leads to wrong early exposure on the teenager.
They want to practice what they see and hear.
3.
WHEN PARENTS FAIL TO GIVE SEX EDUCATION TO THE CHILD Parents often avoid this aspect so very much.
Parents especially illiterates believe that sex education is meant only for adults and that teenagers are still too young to learn about it.
But I tell you even little children require it for proper psychological growth.
4.
LACK OF PARENTAL DISCIPLINE/GUIDANCE Teenagers need close unsuspecting watch.
This is the age where they want to explore, to do things they have never done before.
WHY DO PARENTS NEGLECT THEIR CHILDREN IN THE AREA OF DISCIPLINE I.
Their business: Money conscious parents and parents with large empires are often occupied with the task of keeping their head up in their businesses at the neglect of their children.
II.
Parents who have just a child a just one kind of a sex i.
e only boy, often pamper their child.
They believe discipline is punishment.
4.
PEER GROUP INFLUENCE Whenever you talk about teenagers, they are not complete without their peers.
Research has proven that almost 60% of what a child does is influenced by their peers.
HOW TO KNOW WHEN HE OR SHE HAS FANTASIES ABOUT YOU - Avoids you - Feels shy when you are around - Can't say your name without feeling shy - Talks about you when you are not there - Always wants to find out about you - Always staring at you WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU ARE IN A FANTASY - ACCEPT THAT YOU ARE IN ONE DO not deceive yourself by denying it - Try to pray about it - Discuss with a counselor or mentor - Become friends with the object of your fancy and try to know he or she better in the process issues, values and behaviors you do not agree with will come up, you will realize that he/she is not an angel like you think and before you know it you start seeing he or she has normal.
But this should be managed well.
Orija oluwaponmile brownymails@yahoo.
com
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