Recovery: From the Bottom Up!

Addiction thrives within the fear of those that it affects. It holds families and friends emotionally hostage, afraid that any move in the wrong direction could literally put a loved one "over the edge." Nevertheless, going "over the edge" is one of the only ways to actually hit bottom. If you want someone to go to rehab, just apply enough pressure. If you want them to truly embrace the recovery process, provide them with the opportunity to experience enough discomfort to create the need for change.

Over the past decade I have learned that each person's bottom is different. Often times the family will feel that an individual has hit bottom just because they got arrested or lost a job. The reality that a person's bottom is similar to the care that an individual requires to treat the addiction and/or the underlying issue contributing to the presenting problem/crisis.

For most of my clients, there is no need for anyone to have to go out and look for a bunch of uncomfortable situations to experience. Typically, there are plenty of them to choose from by the time we get the call to help. The key is to strategically capitalize on those situations that have the greatest potential to drive someone to truly desire a real change in their lives. I use the word "capitalize" in the most caring, thoughtful, and enriching way. I take great care to avoid creating significant collateral emotional damage as I work to help a person spiraling out of control. Simultaneously, I have to work to keep the loving and supportive nucleus of the individual's support system intact and working in a unified and solution-focused direction.

When it comes to actually providing someone battling an addiction with the opportunity to experience a "healthy," well-defined, and life-changing bottom; situations that effect family, finances, and personal freedom appear to have the most impact. Loved ones should carefully consider how their care, concern, and generosity could actually exacerbate an already deteriorating situation. Before you do anything else to help that requires anymore of your time and energy, ask yourself the following question: How will my help keep them sober?
At the end of the day, it is imperative to carefully consider all of your options before you try to help a loved one battling an addiction. What may appear to be a simple request for a "short-term" loan, or even a late night "get out of jail" call from your favorite nephew, may actually represent a perfect opportunity for them to begin their recovery from the bottom up!