Sir Hornbook, by Thomas Love Peacock (page two)

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V

Now when Sir Pronoun looked abroad¹⁷,
And spied the coming train,
He left his fort beside the road,
And ran with might and main.

Two cloth-yard shafts from I and U,
Went forth with whizzing sound:
Like lightning sped the arrows true,
Sir Pronoun pressed the ground:
But darts of science ever flew
To conquer, not to wound.

His fear was great: his hurt was small:
Childe Launcelot took his hand:
"Sir Knight," said he, "though doomed to fall
Before my conquering band,


"Yet knightly treatment shall you find, On faith of cavalier:
Then join Sir Substantive behind,
And follow our career."

Sir Substantive, that man of might,
Felt knightly anger rise;
For he had marked Sir Pronoun's flight
With no approving eyes.

"Great Substantive, my sovereign liege!"
Thus sad Sir Pronoun cried,
"When you had fallen in furious siege,
Could I the shock abide?

"That all resistance would be vain,
Too well, alas! I knew:
For what could I, when you were ta'en,
Your poor lieutenant, do?"

Then louder rung Sir Hornbook's horn,
In signals loud and shrill:
His merrymen all, for conquest born,
Went marching up the hill.

VI

Now steeper grew the rising ground,
And rougher grew the road,
As up the steep ascent they wound
To bold Sir Verb's abode¹⁸.

Sir Verb was old, and many a year,
All scenes and climates seeing,
Had run a wild and strange career
Through every mode of being.

And every aspect, shape, and change
Of action, and of passion:
And known to him was all the range
Of feeling, taste, and fashion.

He was an Augur, quite at home
In all things present done¹⁹,
Deeds past, and every act to come
In ages yet to run.

Entrenched in intricacies strong,
Ditch, fort, and palisado,
He marked with scorn the coming throng,
And breathed a bold bravado:

"Ho! who are you that dare invade
My turrets, moats, and fences?
Soon will your vaunting courage fade,
When on the walls, in lines arrayed,
You see me marshal undismayed
My host of moods and tenses²⁰."

"In vain," Childe Launcelot cried in scorn,
"On them is your reliance";
Sir Hornbook wound his bugle horn,
And twang'd a loud defiance.

They swam the moat, they scaled the wall,
Sir Verb, with rage and shame,
Beheld his valiant general fall,
Infinitive by name²¹.

Indicative declared the foes²²
Should perish by his hand;
And stout Imperative arose
The squadron to command²³.

Potential²⁴ and Subjunctive²⁵ then
Came forth with doubt and chance.
All fell alike, with all their men,
Before Sir Hornbook's lance.
Action and Passion nought could do
To save Sir Verb from fate;
Whose doom poor Participle knew²⁶,
He must participate.
Then Adverb, who had skulked behind²⁷
To shun the mighty jar,
Came forward, and himself resigned
A prisoner of war.

Three children of Imperative,
Full strong, though somewhat small,
Next forward came, themselves to give
To conquering Launcelot's thrall.

Conjunction press'd to join the crowd²⁸;
But Preposition swore²⁹.
Though Interjection sobb'd aloud³⁰,
That he would go before.

Again his horn Sir Hornbook blew,
Full long, and loud, and shrill;
His merrymen all, so stout and true,
Went marching up the hill.

VII

Sir Syntax dwelt in thick fir-grove³¹,
All strown with scraps of flowers³²,
Which he had pluck'd to please his love,
Among the Muses' bowers.

His love was gentle Prosody³³,
More fair than morning beam;
Who lived beneath a flowering tree,
Beside a falling stream.

And these two claim'd, with high pretence,
The whole Parnassian ground,
Albeit some little difference
Between their taste was found:
Sir Syntax he was all for sense,
And Prosody for sound.

Yet in them both the Muses fair
Exceedingly delighted;
And thought no earthly thing so rare,
That might with that fond twain compare,
When they were both united.

"Ho! yield, Sir Syntax!" Hornbook cried,
"This youth must pass thy grove,
Led on by me, his faithful guide,
In yonder bowers to rove."

Thereat full much Sir Syntax said,
But found resistance vain:
And through his grove Childe Launcelot sped,
With all Sir Hornbook's train.

They reach'd the tree where Prosody
Was singing in the shade:
Great joy Childe Launcelot had to see,
And hear that lovely maid.

Now onwards as they press'd along,
Did nought their course oppose;
Till full before the martial throng
The Muses' gates arose.

There Etymology they found³⁴,
Who scorned surrounding fruits;
And ever dug in deepest ground,
For old and mouldy roots.

Sir Hornbook took Childe Launcelot's hand,
And tears at parting fell:
"Sir Childe," he said, "with all my band
I bid you here farewell.

"Then wander through these sacred bowers,
Unfearing and alone:
All shrubs are here, and fruits, and flowers,
To happiest climates known."

Once more his horn Sir Hornbook blew,
A parting signal shrill:
His merrymen all, so stout and true,
Went marching down the hill.

Childe Launcelot pressed the sacred ground,
With hope's exulting glow;
Some future song perchance may sound
The wondrous things which there he found,
If you the same would know.

¹⁷ A pronoun is used instead of a noun, and may be considered its locum tenens, or deputy: as "The king is gone to Windsor. he will return tomorrow."

¹⁸ A verb is a word which signifies to be, to do, or to suffer: as "I am, I love, I am loved."

¹⁹ The two lines in italics are taken from Chapman's Homer.

²⁰ Verbs have five moods: the indicative, imperative, potential, subjunctive, and infinitive.

²¹ The infinitive mood expresses a thing in a general and unlimited manner: as "To love, to walk, to be ruled."

²² The indicative mood simply indicates or declares a thing, as, "He loves: he is loved": or asks a question: as "Does he love? Is he loved?"

²³ The imperative mood commands or entreats: as "Depart: come hither: forgive me."

²⁴ The potential mood implies possibility or obligation: as "It may rain; they should learn."

²⁵ The subjunctive mood implies contingency: as "If he were good, he would be happy."

²⁶ The participle is a certain form of the verb, and is so called from participating the nature of a verb and an adjective: as "he is an admired character; she is a loving child."

²⁷ The adverb is joined to verbs, to adjectives, and to other adverbs, to qualify their signification: as "that is a remarkably swift horse: it is extremely well done,"

²⁸ A conjunction is a part of speech chiefly used to connect words: as "King and constitution"; or sentences: as "I went to the theatre, and saw the new pantomime."

²⁹ A preposition is most commonly set before another word to show its relation to some word or sentence preceding: as "The fisherman went down the river with his boat."
Conjunctions and prepositions are for the most part imperative moods of obsolete verbs: thus, and signifies add: "John and Peter; John add Peter: the fisherman with his boat; the fisherman, join his boat."

³⁰Interjections are words thrown in between the parts of a sentence, to express passions or emotions: as "Oh!" "Alas!"

³¹Syntax is that part of grammar, which treats of the agreement and construction of words in a sentence.

³² I allude to the poetical fragments with which syntax is illustrated.

³³Prosody is that part of grammar which treats of the true pronunciation of words, and the rules of versification.

³⁴Etymology is that part of grammar, which investigates the roots, or derivation, of words.